Fall/Early Winter, 2001

In the TV world there's "cheers and jeers." In the movie world there's "thumbs up" and "thumbs down." Well, here in cyberspace, there's dots and slashes. What goings-on hit the "dot" right on the mark, and which should be "slashed"? Here are Techtite's thoughts...

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Slash :  To yet another instance of cheap commercial gimmicks online. If you go to a few online sites recently (including gameplanet, and other reputable locations), you've probably seen a slew of casino online ads. There's this recent one, though, that punches below the belt, to try to entice you to click it. How? The animated .GIF for the file resembles a file window, that unscrupulously opens, asking "Are you sure you want to download this file?" Of course, if it's the middle of the night and you're not thinking clearly, you're likely to click "Yes" or "No" on the window that appears, which is actually just an animated GIF simulating an authentic Windows prompt (fortunately for Mac-owners, the window's fakeness is immediately discernable). Of course, clicking anywhere on the window is simply a click on the ad, jumping you to the commercial link. Come on, guys; do you really need to pull such stunts just for a few extra "hits"?

DOT : To movie companies with a sense of humor. Many theaters on opening day of Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, showed movie trailers with an added surprise...and I'm not talking about the Star Wars Episode 2 teaser. I'm talking about the hilarious, updated Monsters, Inc. trailer, where Sully and Mike are playing charades. What movie title is Sully trying to portray? Harry Potter, of course. The trailer concludes with the messages: "Monsters Inc...now showing at a theater near you...really near you...like, maybe, right next door." Indeed, Pixar; thanks for the humble, humorous trailer that started the movie off just right.

DOT : To celebrities with a sense of humor. In the latest Pepsi commercial --which frankly, is far more inspired than that silly Britney Spears song for the product, during the Oscars-- Hallie Eisenberg is drinking Pepsi, when a man notices her. She then pulls off a mask to reveal she's not Hallie Eisenberg...she's Halle Berry, drinking the new Pepsi Twist. The real joke begins, though, when Halle Berry pulls off yet another mask, to reveal she's Barry Bostwick. "Who's Barry Bostwick?" asks the man, while Barry humbly just smiles and shrugs. Thanks to such humility in Barry, this is the most entertaining new ad of the holiday season, that makes me grin every time I see it. Thanks, Barry.

DOT : To the old game company that keeps on giving. Of course, it was a total disappointment when Looking Glass Studios, the makers of Thief: The Dark Project and System Shock 2, were no longer in business, regardless of their critically-acclaimed games. However, it seems many other game companies have gotten the message; that a ho-hum "shoot everything moving until bored" action game can be so, so much more. We've already seen No One Lives Forever adopt the "stealth is often better than bravado" action strategy, and just recently ID Software itself helped release Return to Castle Wolfenstein, with more strategy than just the typical Quake Arena shootfest. 

DOT : To sticking to a promise. Many people were concerned that the "special trailer" of Star Wars Episode 2: Attack of The Clones, for owners of the DVD, would be a mere sneak peek of the trailer offered in theaters a week later. Not so; these are two totally different trailers. In fact, almost scene-by-scene, they show totally different images. I know I already gave a thumbs-up "dot" accolade to the DVD trailer; now, I give it one more, for not being a cheap, brief sales pitch to be shown in theaters just a week later. This also means...two trailers for the new film, just in time for the holiday season! Thanks again, George.

Slash :  To making a formerly realistic-looking school drama into a farce, simply for a ratings boost. I can forgive David Kelly for adding Jeri "Voyager" Ryan to the cast of his so-so hit, Boston Public. I can forgive him (and her) for trying to spice up the show a little --as well as deliver the message, that teachers are human beings, too-- by showing her character's personal life, including the obligatory shower scene. What I cannot forgive, is the demeaning of the dialog into unrealistic banter. This new teacher is spoken to by her class with totally inept, mind-numbing-drivel, which might as well be as blunt as, "Hey, kids! It's the Star Trek babe who was always in skin-tight outfits!" One student even asks point-blank if he can see her breasts. While this something a pencil neck dweeb MIGHT ask of Jeri Ryan, he'd hardly dare ask this from his high school teacher...unless he likes the thought of attending detention for a year and a half. Compare such dialog to Lara Flynn Boyle's starting gig on The Practice, which was sexy, yet never demeaning, unrealistic, or poorly written. Jeri Ryan deserves no less.

DOT : To a DVD gift that keeps on giving. People who purchased the DVD of Star Wars Episode 1: The Phantom Menace, were offered a special, advance trailer of the upcoming sequel, right on the internet! The copy protection was a little strict (so strict, my original download of the trailer didn't work), and bandwidth problems, with millions of simultaneous downloads, made it a two-hour job even on my lightning fast DSL connection. Regardless, it's a cool trailer, and it was a nice reward for owners of the disc. Thanks, George.

Slash :  To trying to make a buck based on 9 minutes of work. Everyone has probably heard of the short film that was offered on the internet late last year, George Lucas in Love. It was a Shakespeare in Love parody involving George Lucas' inspiration for the original Star Wars film. It also, very quickly, became one of the most downloaded shorts online. Don't expect to see it online ever again, though; the film is now being sold as a DVD, with all online links to view it no longer active. I'm sorry; am I supposed to pay the price of a DVD to see a nine minute film short...? To make matters worse, owners of the disc claim that the quality of the film short in DVD form looks no better than the best-resolution offered for free online; i.e., not DVD quality at all. The DVD does include a few other film shorts to make the purchase more reasonable, though come on, now; a 9-minute film offered for free, should remain free.