Let's look at the bright side: it could've been worse. Ever since we heard the big ballyhoo about the "You-Tube" crowd being offered to film their own Super Bowl commercials, a whole lot of amateur cameramen cried "yahoo!" Everyone else probably just cried. Yet when not one amateur commercial made this year's "worst" list, and one even made the Best list (seriously); who would have thought that?

Adding to the good news (before jumping straight to the bad!): there were many commercials that were good this year. It's also fair to say that while it was very hard to narrow our list of 20 favorites this year to a top ten Best List, it was quite easy to choose the worst. Interpret that as you will. If a commercial isn't on either list; look at the bright side. It was neither the very best...nor horribly worst! That said; here are the worst Super Bowl commercials for 2007:

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Getting Robbed By Your Bank? (E-Trade) The Gist of It: Guys wearing cheap animal Halloween masks rob the bank patrons of all their money. The joke is: these "robbers" work at the bank. The idea is that you shouldn't feel "robbed" by your bank. Why the Commercial Fails: Yes, we get it. We just don't think it's funny. If E-Trade is so "extraordinary" ---as the final promo boasts--- you would think they would create a better Superbowl commercial than this.

The Snickers Kiss (Snickers) The Gist of It: Guy in auto shop eats a Snickers. For reasons that make utterly no sense, he doesn't take a bite out of it, and just leaves the whole bar in his mouth. Other Auto Mechanic sees the Snickers bar in his coworker's mouth, and takes a bite out of it...and another...and another. They "almost" kiss. They suddenly want to do something "manly," so they rip out chest hairs together. Why the Commercial Fails: Keep your homophobe trump cards in your pants, please. Think about this one for a bit. What this commercial is basically saying is that the only person who'd love to eat a Snickers is a closeted homosexual, and even then, the joy of eating a Snickers cannot replace the utter bile and desire for self-mutilation when doing something that might look "gay" to a total moron. In the end you have a commercial that winds up annoying homophobes, homosexuals...and everyone else.

"Maybe you should tell the box you're stuck!" (H&R Block) The Gist of It: Another "husbands are idiots and wives are geniuses" ad. Gee; how brilliant of H&R Block to show such an ad, during the freaking Super Bowl. But we digress. Ms. Dork is mad at Mr. Dork for getting "stuck" doing the taxes, and horror of horrors, he asked his wife for help. Only Mizz Dork is too prim and proper to help her husband with the taxes; she feels he should talk to someone else(?). The "joke" is that he could've spoken to someone else, if he hadn't bought software that came in a box. So, asks the wife; why doesn't he just ask the box for help? Tee-hee! Why the Commercial Fails: Though this was not a true Super bowl commercial per se (we've winced at it too many times by now already), we are SO sick and tired of this stupid, inane, insipid, female-chauvinist-pig of a commercial. So the guy should talk to the box for help? Or: maybe he could ask his "genius" wife to "brilliantly" help him do their freaking taxes. Gee...do you think?

Funeral Drive Thru (Tim Hortons) The Gist of It:  To hear this commercial tell it: a guy from Ottawa Canada was so in love with Tim Hortons, he asked his funeral procession to pass by the drive thru. "Find out why." Come to Tim Hortons and eat their breakfast sandwich. Why the Commercial Fails: Call us morbid, though it's not brilliant for a food retailer to confess what a dead guy's favorite place to eat was. Maybe if this guy lived to be 100, we'd be impressed. Otherwise he's just some dude who wanted to do something unusual for his funeral. Whatever.

Cheesy Bites (Pizza Hut) The Gist of It: Jessica Simpson glides down the red carpet, only to dart back in the limo to chase down her favorite "Cheesy Bites" pizza at Pizza Hut. Why the Commercial Fails: Uh-huh. Sure; like a girl with a size-one figure eats pizza...or real food, for that matter. Oh, and while we are at it, we must demand that poor Jessica get a better makeup specialist for her commercials. The bright glossy red lipstick and pale white face made her look like she was 40.

Beard Comb Over (Sierra Mist) The Gist of It: A guy is fired because of his bad comb-over, which is so bad it uses his beard as the hair. Hey, though; the guy likes Sierra Mist Free, which tastes just like regular Sierra Mist. Why the Commercial Fails: Not to be totally mean but it's unwise to hire a chubby guy to promote a diet drink. Secondly; what is this commercial trying to say to us? That dorks with really bad hair love their diet soda products? Nice.

Male Stripper Car Wash (GM) The Gist of It: Ladies are oh so embarrassed and oh so giggly at the oh so obedient and oh so submissive men who are willing to strip themselves while washing their oh so beautiful car. Why the Commercial Fails: Look; we're not going to go onto our "what's with all the female chauvinism in modern commercials" soap box again. We're just confused as to what this commercial is trying to say. Why would a bunch of men strip down to wash a car? What's more; this commercial didn't get a single complaint from the puritans who just last year whined like little kids when that GoDaddy model ---horrors!--- broke her bra strap. Yet men can be in their jockey shorts while washing a car filled with business women? Oh, Yeah; we got how the women were all in business suits while the men all looked like dorks. Gee: Isn't it wonderful how little sexism there is on TV these days? Har, har....har.

The Garmin Ultraman (Garmin) The Gist of It:  If you had a new map device that could help you when lost on the road, how would you promote it? Would you show how it can locate you in the middle of the desert in Nevada? No! Show The Garmin Ultraman defeating...the evil map beast! Why the Commercial Fails: Um, I'm sorry...what?!?

We Liked Monkeys Much Better... (Career Builder) The Gist of It: Career Builder.com is well known for its commercial campaign where a human coworker is forced to work with monkeys. We all could relate to that one. Yet all the commercials for Career Builder this year were, well...kind of silly. Nerds dressed in office supplies fighting like gladiators for a raise? People tortured in the jungle during their "employee evaluations"...? Why the Commercial Fails: Somehow, a guy screaming while walking over hot coals isn't as fun to watch as monkeys wearing ties. Sorry.

"Comedy Night Done Right" (NBC) The Gist of It: So we're going to iFilm to see the commercials again, one at a time, to more fairly judge them. Hey; maybe we didn't like them because we ate a bad piece of popcorn or something. Yet for every commercial watched, we either have to see K-Fed's commercial, or "Comedy Night Done Right." Let's just say that we had it up to our funny bone with the annoyingly edited footage of the sitcoms saying in unison the words "Comedy" and "Night" and "Done" and "Right." Edited, it sounds like they're all saying Comedy Night Done Right Comedy Night Done Right Comedy Night Done Right Comedy Night Done Right. Why the Commercial Fails: It may be tolerable in small doses, but when seen 20 times in one day; this was just plain annoying.

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