Techtite Feature Article!

"Picard is annoyed at the Borg. Lily is shocked that Picard is annoyed at the Borg. Well; of course he is, Lily! Didn't you see the series?"

---from the article

-------------

Sidebar :

-------------

An Eggshell Walk Best Left For "Sidebar"...
Yeah; I know what some fans of "First Contact" are thinking. Lily was played by Alfre Woodard. That must mean she was important, because: she was the "token ethnic character." Oh, sure. It's not like TNG had any ethnic characters. Except for Michael Dorn as Worf. And LeVar "Roots" Burton as Lt. Commander LaForge. And Whoopi freaking Goldberg. Sorry; "token ethnic character" was not a good enough reason to put "Lily Sloane" in this movie. Seeing as how that was the only reason to put her in this movie, there was no reason to put you in this movie! You see how that works, Lily? Now, be a good little worthless character and go play in the air lock.

-----------------

Feel free to contribute. As always, review submissions are accepted!

------------------

Fanboys of Star Trek's "Next Generation" will tell you that Star Trek: First Contact was a classic Trek movie. Of course they would; without that movie, every "TNG" movie sucked. Yet I'd be far more ready to jump on the "First Contact rocked" band wagon, if not for Lily Sloane, the sardonic shrew who saw "First Contact," completely patronizing everyone she met along the way.

The idea was that Zefram Cochrane had help making the spaceship he needed, which led to Earth's "First Contact." Well; of course he had help building a whole spaceship. That ship was huge! Yet if we were going to meet one (yes; one) of "the other guys" who helped build Chochrane's ship, why choose the shrew? Not only that; she's a worthless-to-the-story shrew, who acts goofy one minute ("Borg? Sounds Swedish! Hee!"), while talking smack to Picard minutes later.

Here's an example. Picard is annoyed at the Borg. Lily is shocked that Picard is annoyed at the Borg. Well; of course he is, Lily! Didn't you see the series? They rammed a laser penlight into his eye socket and used him like a puppet. No, insists Lily; to want to hunt down and destroy the Borg is like Captain Ahab hunting his whale. Um...Lily? I fail to remember how Ahab's whale was going to destroy all humankind as we know it. See; that's why Picard is so concerned. He's worried that the Borg are going to keep coming back to destroy humankind unless he puts a stop to it. You'd think Lily would have a clue. Nope; she's too busy telling Picard that the best strategy is to blow up his ship, run like crazy, and hope the Borg are too stupid to notice that the ship is getting hotter and the engine is humming. Whoh; great plan, Lily! Except...not.

However; this was 1996, so expect the obligatory "woman genius next to idiot man" cliché, even if that meant making the male idiot...Picard? Yep! Here's Picard, the captain of the flagship of all the fleet, screaming "NO" like a child and tossing his toy ships around. Waaaah! You compared me to Ahab! Waaaah! Worst. Trek. Scene. Ever. Wait! It gets worse: "You bwoke your widdle ships," snaps Lily, as she smugly exits the room. One wonders how "smug" Lily would feel, had she been the one with a red penlight crammed into her eye socket.

-------------------------------

 What was your choice for best/worst sci-fi series, ever...?

Send your opinions to Techtite's Letters page!