What is "My Two Bits?"

My Two Bits is the official editorial page for the editor of Techtite.com. Techtite will accept reader submissions, for reviews as well as any editorials deemed well written and pertinent to this web site's audience.

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---DEATH to pop-up window commercials!

---Off the "Daily Radar"...

---PG-13: An Asset, or a Curse?

---Sept. 11, 2001...

---Down with pop- ups: THE SEQUEL!

---Next Generation magazine is gone, [sniff]!

---Movies "Based on a Video Game"? YOU WISH!

---25 Years, and STILL no Light Saber!

---Why "Ludicrous Gibs is cool, and "Suggestive themes" is banned...

---Star Wars: It's All The Same To Me...

---Bulletin Bored.

---Oscar's 75th: A Look Back...

---Buffy, Faith, Willow and Dawn...

more>>>>>

No sidebar comments for this review. Yet.

My Two Bits for April, 2003 is titled :

Why You'll NEVER Be "April Fooled" at Techtite.com

Who likes April Fools Jokes? Nobody does. No, really; while many teenagers like to smirk and say "good one, dude" when punk'd by a close friend (who really isn't), the truth is, nobody likes them. In fact, you're not likely to see a single April Fools joke here at Techtite.com. I suppose the April edition of My Two Bits is the best place to explain why.

First, a little back story to April Fools. You may have asked (when really, really bored) how April Fools started, and by whom. The truth is, it was started when someone visited a bunch of natives --I forget the exact timeline, though I'd presume it was a long time ago-- and the natives did not celebrate New Years on January 1st; they celebrated it April 1st. These natives were then called "April Fools" by the visitors (yeah; they had great political correctness back then, didn't they?). Clearly, this was a very ignorant, naive age of explorers, when it had not yet been discovered that, DUH, not everybody has the same calendar as the Romans. However, this was immaterial at the time; In the end, "April Fool's Day" was coined.

No joke. This is the true origin of the whole April Fools ruse, and when you think about it, the biggest fools were the pitiable folk who made an unofficial "holiday" about people who were supposedly oh-so-foolish...for having a different yearly calendar. Man; if only you could go back in time, eh? You'd love to set these nimrods straight. The people who celebrated New Years on a different day were hardly fools. They were just different people, with a different culture, idiots. Yet there's nobody more foolish than those who follow the fool, so soon, everybody wanted to mockingly "celebrate" April Fools Day. They would tell jokes, act the opposite of the way they're "supposed" to...and of course, play pranks, where "Ha-ha, April Fools!" was the punch line. The rest is history, as they say.

Okay, so maybe I'm in the need of a better sense of humor. However, let me confess the truth: I'm an April Fools Baby. Much like celebrities like Debbie Reynolds, Annette O'Toole, Ali MacGraw, and classic B-movie sirens like Shanna McCullough and Jennifer Runyon, I was born on April 1st. Sure, sometimes it sucks to have such a birthday, though hey, talk about some cool celebrities to share a birthday with, eh?

April Fools Day is chosen by others as well...as their wedding day! Over three celebrities call April Fool's Day their wedding anniversary, including NYPD Blue's Dennis Franz, and the legendary Gene Autry, who married his first wife Ina Mae Spivey in 1932. They were married 68 years, right until her death in 1980. No, kids, this is not an April Fool's Joke.

So, you can see why I look at April Fools Day in a different light as some other entertainment sites...video game rags in particular. Yeah...Some game mags do go a bit far in "celebrating" April Fools Day, don't they? Some even publish a totally faked article each year, telling kids something can be achieved in a game by getting 1,000,000 points, or finding 125 (out of 124) stars, or some other similar ruse. Sure, they confess the joke in their next issue, though not until a whole slew of young kids have fallen for the joke, leading to tons of frustration and possibly even tears for the youngest kids. Am I without a sense of humor, here, when I ask where's the joke?

So, rest easy; when you see something here at Techtite.com on April 1st, it's here because it's a fact. Well, okay, when it comes to reviews, it's an opinion, though let's just say that the fact that it's our opinion is a fact. No sir, there will be no April Fool's Jokes here on my watch. Spending your hard earned money on the right entertainment products is no laughing matter. We take such concerns very seriously. So should everyone.

Once again, I'm Techtite, and these are My Two Bits...