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Techtite's DVD Reviews! |
"It would take The Ugly Truth to make anyone not see this as the Worst Movie of 2009...and even then, it is a very close race." --from the review ------------- Sidebar :: ------------- The Comedienne Mystique. What is up with all the females in "comedy" these days, who are simply not funny? While every comedian needs a "straight man" (figuratively not literally) to bounce their jokes against; even the straight man is often funny. Abbot and Costello, Laurel and Hardy, and George and Gracie are just three examples of pairs who were both funny, even when one was supposed to be the "funnier guy." Yet consistently, modern comedies seemingly feel that feminists would be aghast if the woman was portrayed as being "silly," or "funny," or "comical." Why is that? Is it because men are better comics than women? Or perhaps it's because women are too insecure to be funny? Obviously those last two questions are rhetorical at best, and sarcasm at worst. I'm just saying: one of this comedy's biggest flaws was that half of the cast wasn't trying to be funny...and this was meant as a comedy. Think about it.
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Couples Retreat
Click photo to order this DVD. Review by TechtiteAs always, a review of The Show and the DVD extras. The Show: There's a sort of "running gag" of mine, where I tell all my male friends that if their significant other makes them watch Terms of Endearment, they hate you. When watching Couples Retreat, I find myself wondering if that joke should have a rewrite. Never before have I seen a supposed comedy drama so worthless in both comedy (no jokes!) and drama (no likeable characters!), all at the same time.The story is simple: four couples go to a vacation resort, as a sort of couples therapy session. Jason (Jason Bateman) and Cynthia (Kristen Bell) are having trouble conceiving; so much so it is hurting their marriage. Joey (Jon Favreau) and Lucy (Kristin Davis) have been married ever since Lucy got pregnant with Joey's love child in high school...though how stable is their marriage now? Shane (Faizon Love) has been dumped by his wife, only to engage in a mid-life crisis of sorts, with a 20-something girl (Kali Hawk) who keeps calling him "daddy." Meanwhile, Dave (Vince Vaughn) and Ronnie (Malin Akerman) have two little kids and what appears to be a flawless marriage...though is it? The biggest flaw with comedies like this, is that it's so busy putting the supposed "heroes" in depressing situations, it forgets the need to be funny at the same time. As soon as the couples arrive at the alleged "retreat," they're told they have to be ready for therapy sessions at 6 AM. Where is the joke here? Unless you think the joke is "heh heh they are ordered to wake up at 6 AM while on vacation"...no, there is no joke here. Nor is it funny when the therapists coerce each couple to complain, then bicker, then whine, and oh goody: scream at each other during these therapy sessions. This is supposed to be a comedy, right? As soon as you think that things can only go uphill from here...nope; they get worse. Fanboys of "comedy dramas" might ask me how "dramatic" the movie is. Well...not much. I might've forgiven this movie for its complete lack of humor, if it at least had a memorable scene in any capacity. Yet even the drama falls flat here. It's one thing to begin the story with three troubled marriages, none of which the viewer cares about. Yet then the couples suffer the obligatory "boys lose girls" moment of the film, and even then the viewer could care less. You might wonder if one, or any, of these couples wind up together in the end. The real question is: does it matter? There's nobody to root for here. Why even bother watching this? Now, I'm not one for spoilers, though this spoiler has nothing to do with the story (and the story already sucks anyway!) so I just have to share this little detail with you. The story begins with Dave's littlest son announcing with pride that he just peed...in his dad's bed. The movie's crowning moment, just before credits? Why not: the same kid has finally graduated from number one...to number two. Lovely. Seconds after seeing this humorless "final shot," my fellow female couch potato insisted that, hey; it could've been a much better movie. Oh, sure...if it had a better script...and better dialog...and more jokes...and oh yes; if the entire movie was replaced with Ferris Bueller's Day Off. Then, yes, it would be a better film. As-is, this Retreat is a typical mistake in most comedians' careers, that they need to recover from. Hopefully.
The DVD Extras: Extras? Unfortunately: yes. Why include them? I have no idea. Look; I've taken a lot of pot shots at this movie, both in this review and elsewhere, and let me tell you: these extras are even more worthless than the movie. Example? How about an "alternate ending" where the gang gets off the plane back home, says their goodbyes and...nothing. That's it! I've heard of alternate endings being subpar to the ending chosen, though this is just bananas. There was no point to this "ending" in any way! Why did they even film this? Deleted scenes? As you might expect; they all had reasons to be deleted. For example: one batch of deleted scenes shows signs that Joey and Lucy did indeed cheat on each other. Personally, I felt that the "did he or didn't he" element of the story was much more effective than just seeing flat out "they both cheated and their marriage is a sham." In an additional gag reel of sorts, we get to see the "therapists" try to make their scenes more interesting in what appear to be ad-libbed scenes, which caused many of the actors to just crack up.Gee; I would've loved to crack up while watching the movie. Why didn't they put some of these scenes in the actual film? Additional scenes are self explanatory. You get a lovely added video of Bora-Bora, where the movie was filmed. You get an audio commentary. You get an extended look at the yoga scene; enough said there. Then there's the gag reel, which leads to a fitting parting thought. What is up with all the bad comedies offering a "gag reel"? Could these guys stop laughing it up long enough to make us laugh as well? I'm just saying.
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