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Techtite's Shows & Parks Reviews! |
----------------- Feel free to contribute. As always, review submissions are accepted! ------------------
------------- Sidebar :: ------------- The "mystery" is afoot. No, actually it was an electrical room door. No, seriously, read the review; the mystery's solution was "Please go to the door marked 'electrical room' and open it now." The person who did that, WON! However, they also had no life if they spent all vacation solving this inept puzzle. Either way, this year's theme could've been a rousing smash hit, if handled by the folks at Contemporary resort. Remember that cool Disney Villains year...? That was inspired with a capital "I". This year was a word jumble, whose only "puzzle" was in so few people knowing what the mystery was at all. Mysteries are no fun at conventions if only one person figures out the mystery by dumb luck of happenstance when everyone else is simply bewildered. |
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Disneyana Convention: 2002
(Convention Theme: A mystery!!!)(...literally!)A Techtite ReviewIt is important to remember that this was EPCOT's first time hosting the annual Disneyana Convention. It was inevitable they would make a few mistakes their first time at bat. However, it would be equally expected that if asked to host a ten year old event, of the most stouthearted of Disney fandom, a Disney theme park would treat the event with the utmost of effort, respect, and common courtesy. Last year, Disneyland treated "conventionEars" like part of the family, in a well-planned convention whose theme was a "Disney Family Reunion." In this year's theme --An Official Disneyana Mystery-- the biggest mystery was why anybody bothered to come at all.
This is where the mystery
begins to unfold.
Registration, limited edition pick-up, logo pick-up, and all behind-the-scenes tours, were conducted from a tent Costs cut this much, should only be leading to cool freebie$ elsewhere, right? Wrong. Some estimates of convention price --excluding hotel lodging, etc.-- were around $600, yet the registration package included little more than a small "detective" memo pad (complete with "Mickey Badge"), and a "collectible" coin (though the fact they casually gave away this "rare" coin in a flimsy envelope was not very inspiring as to this coin's value.). Compared to prior Disneyanas --with free tree ornaments, statuettes, and miniature clock sculptures, often placed in a reusable convention bag (my mom uses her Disneyana 2000 bag to this very day!)-- this year's registration package was a pittance. Couldn't they have at least put these items in a cloth "detective" briefcase, instead of a thin cardboard envelope that would tear as soon as you used the carry strap? At least artists who came to the event offered memorabilia worth buying. Armani provided a fantastic statuette of Jessica Rabbit, sculpted not unlike the classic actresses of 1940's film noir mysteries (perfect for the mystery theme this year). Likewise for the official Disneyana 2002 poster by Randy Noble, the Sherlock Holmes-style "detective Mickey" hats by Jeff Ebersohl, another adorable collector's doll by Marie Osmond (yes, that Marie Osmond; in person!), and many more impressive items, by over 32 artists. They are what Disneyana is all about, and they made this convention far more palatable. It's a shame they had to come to a convention as poorly handled as this. "Poorly handled"...? You're right; I guess "poorest handled" is more like it. Consider the final event of the convention; a self served breakfast. I'm not being snooty here, just wondering: why no formal banquet like they've had every year for this same convention, for the past ten years? Yet the real problem with this breakfast was how it was supposedly informal yet tried to be formal, leading to a total mess. First of all, if I am to be assigned a table, they could at least show me where that table is! The non-consecutive numbering system for these tables was so haphazard that not a single cast member on duty had any clue where my table was. There wasn't even a stage show --couldn't a few costumed characters dance around a little?-- and in the end, you were asked to go half a mile in the hot sun, clear across the park, to get your "free gift." Why force conventioneers to go on such a trek, when they could'be been simply handed their gift while seated? The answer may surprise you; as soon as guests left to get their gift, they were barred from the convention area (!), because then it was officially "public day," and new $wallets$ meant conventioneers --and their old money-- were old news. Any convention which would treat its paying conventioneers this poorly has to be the poorest convention, indeed. True, even the irrefutably worst of Disneyana Conventions would have a hard time ruining "theme night": the day on each Disneyana Convention when an entire area of a Disney theme park (in this case, EPCOT Future World West) is reserved for 2 hours after closing time, to convention guests only. Yet regardless of the free food, all rides open (yeah...both of them), and a rare appearance by Robert Sherman (if you were lucky enough to see him), this evening had disappointments. One: the "reserved location" for the Illuminations show was so small, as much as 95% of conventioneers were peeking over heads like they always do, making the concept of a "reserved location" pretty worthless. Second, the so-called "exclusive" EPCOT parade was not even half as long as that same parade is, during regular morning park hours. Third, all guests staying at EPCOT resorts --Yacht Club, Beach Club, and Boardwalk-- were a mere walk away from their rooms, yet were asked to go clear in the other direction, all the way to the BUS stop (!), and what's more; your hotel was very unlikely to be the first stop...when it was just a walk away to begin with. In my case ---no joking here--- my unnecessary bus ride extended a mere ten minute walk to two hours. The feeling was not unlike taking a flight from New York City to Boston, with a connecting flight in Tokyo. One may ask what I expected. Conventions of any type are grab bags, depending entirely on who's hosting, and how "attached" they are to the convention. However, that's my point; this is Disneyana, in Disney World. It's not like we were in an obscure convention in a hotel that should barely care. A Disney fan convention at Disney World is not like, for example, a yarn collector's convention at the local Holiday Inn. EPCOT was asked to provide accommodations for around 2,000 of Disney Studios' biggest fans. Yet so blasé was their attitude while hosting this convention, some cast members didn't even know the convention was going on! Some would say such corner-trimming was due to a weaker economy. However, why then did conventioneers find the money to go at all? If they were willing to pay to get in, EPCOT should have made the price worth it. Admittedly, after all this negative input, I would be hypocritical if I did not provide a few suggestions to improve things. For one, if that parking lot tent was intended to appease el cheapo blowhards at non-EPCOT resorts, here's a tip: make the convention for EPCOT resort guests ONLY. There are five resorts near EPCOT, kids; choose one! Every single convention I've attended was held primarily at a Disney Resort Hotel; the lack of such accommodations this year, I feel, was half the problem. Solving this problem means no need for parking lot tents (one more time: no more parking lot tents!), or, at the very extreme least, a tent that's near the entrance to the park. Oh, and one added free tip: bring back the banquet! A convention's finale should be unforgettable. If this means raising the price, do so, telling people this means the banquet's back. We're all adults here (well, kind of). We'll understand. At the extreme least, EPCOT shouldn't ever pass the buck, so that low men on the cast member totem pole are blamed for this convention's failures. Not true. They were friendly, kind, courteous, and if anyone was lacking in candor, it was their tin-hearted "superiors," not them (not to name names, ERIC, though you could have been more polite to my 64 year old mother, when barricading convention guests from re-entering the ShowPlace after the breakfast, just to make way for public day's new wallets. A 64 year old conventioneer looking for a little air conditioning was no "threat" to your profit margins, pal). Eric notwithstanding, cast members' desire to help was only limited by what little they were given to work with. It was in fact quite sad to see so many friendly employees with that "Brother can you spare me a dime?" look in their eyes; totally willing to help, though given no decent resources to do so. How sad.
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Burnout
Near
Miss
Small
Crater
Large
Crater
Deep
Impact
Let's
start with space. EPCOT certainly has
space to hold a big convention; that's an understatement! In addition to
space out in the open, there is the World
ShowPlace, in between the lands of
England and Canada (no, not Greenland). I know it's easy to say this as a conventioneer, but seeing how
the convention is always held on an "off season," there's
equally no reason not to close off a theater/food cafe for three days, for
additional space. As if that wasn't enough; there are five EPCOT hotels
(!), three of which are
just a walk away from the park. This was a convention planned over a year in advance, guys;
finding space for the convention shouldn't be a problem.
...in the EPCOT
parking lot.
No, not a tent near the entrance; a tent in the farthest, leftmost section
of the lot, which could only be reached by car. I don't mean to be snooty,
though I don't spend money to be on Disney property only to have to drive
to one of the theme park parking lots, to places that could've just as easily been
in the park, or --dare
one think it?-- one of the hotels. To add insult to
injury: Transportation to
this tent began at 9:30, with most convention tours leaving before
9:00; how's that for good
planning? Worst of all: this was a leaky (!) tent, which even if
visited during non-rain hours, left many collectors
uneasy that their
$pricey$ limited edition collectibles were so poorly protected prior to
pick- up. You mean to tell me there was no place to put these events in
the park...or at least, NEAR the park?
What conclusion can I offer, having attended
seven Disneyana conventions prior to this one? This is a mystery easily solved, even
if you missed that guy on stage during the final day breakfast, giving the
solution to this year's "Mystery." Oh, in case you wondered; the
mystery puzzle (with no instructions for the puzzle given, ever) was in fact just a word jumble, whose
decoded message was as simple as "The first person to find the electrical
room door and open it WINS!" No; I'm serious! The solution to this puzzle was so long and
convoluted guests started booing the "detective" explaining it, though
its general solution involved creating a sentence based on the seventh word of each
clue. Sound like fun? Well, then do it in
this review, and read the painful truth: This
has to be the poorest Disneyana Convention I ever attended.
Here's hoping next year is better. It can't possibly be worse.