It's hard to critique an awards show that makes you think to yourself, "Gee, this is just an awards show." However, that is the case with Oscar Night 2001, as hosted by Steve Martin, on March 25th. In an awards show that kept true to its insistence for short show length, the telecast was less than even the estimated time of 3 and a half hours; an occurrence unheard of on Oscar night for years! However, there's still the feeling that it only ran short because so much we've grown accustomed to was cut out completely.

Steve Martin made for an admirable host. He wasn't Billy Crystal, though neither is anybody else, so that's an unfair way to judge his performance. Personally, excluding Crystal, I think he's the best Oscar host to accept the job for over a dozen years! Yes, this includes  David Letterman and Whoopi Goldberg, whose unique senses of humor just didn't mesh with Oscar night. Martin's did, even when his jokes ran slightly cliché: "I saw Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon and wondered where the tigers and dragons were. Then I realized: they were crouching, and hidden." Audience members helped some of the jokes along, particularly Hanks, when Martin mused that he knew who was behind the attempt to kidnap Russel Crowe, and "...all I can say is, [fellow Best Actor nominee] Tom Hanks, you should be ashamed." Hanks gave a hilariously "guilty" expression on his face, making the joke even funnier. This moment even rivaled the moment when Danny DeVito was caught eating a carrot to pass the time, and Martin later comes out to offer him some dip!

The show's opening needed some work, though. This montage of classic Oscar moments floating through space was flawed for two reasons. One, the clips shown were moving too quick through space to enjoy them. The second mistake was the cliché background music choice, of the overused classical score of 2001: A Space Odyssey. I must take this time to thank all other shows for the past 3 months, to NOT overuse a cliché that seems to say, "Oh, it's 2001! That means we have to play the music from the film over and over and over!" Leave it to the Oscars, to feel differently about cliché opening numbers. The introduction of host Steve Martin --by the crew of the International Space Station -- was intriguing, and yet they should have just jumped to that, and not let a barrel of cheap 1960's sci-fi FX spoil the moment.

Awards speeches were limited to 45 seconds, and while some speeches were given a slight leeway, the majority of them were held firm to that rule. As for the awards winners who gave those speeches, well, let's put it this way: did anyone win the office pool? Julia Roberts seems to be the only (DUH) expected winner. Russel Crowe was the odds-on favorite for Best Actor, and yet many felt Tom Hanks would win, because of Crowe's role in the tabloids last year. It's nice the Academy proved them wrong, and gave Crowe a well-earned Oscar, regardless of his personal life. Benicio Del Toro won as Best Supporting Actor, while a pleasant surprise for Best Supporting Actress, had Marcia Gay Harden win for her role in "Pollock." In addition, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon" might have had an uphill battle to win Best Picture, yet got the award it richly deserved, in the Best Foreign Film category.

In a surprise upset similar to when Saving Private Ryan's director won, yet not the film (Shakespeare in Love won), this year had Gladiator win Best Picture, yet not Best Director (which went to Steven Soderbergh for Traffic). It's amusing to note that DreamWorks made both Ryan and Gladiator. This year, Dreamworks' role on Oscar night has been reversed, with them being the ones who must defend a Best Picture winner that, allegedly, directed itself. In case you're asking, though: Why didn't Traffic win Best Picture? Well, it may be due to the fact that only one acting performance was awarded, and that was for Best Supporting Actor. No lead role was even nominated. Russel Crowe was nominated --and won-- for his Gladiator performance, and the movie won, largely, due to that performance.

Every year there's a worthy recipient, of the "For crying out loud, it was only a movie" acceptance speech award. This award has been given to the likes of James Cameron ("King of the woooorld! Woooo!"), and Sally Field ("You like me...you really really like me!"). This year, the award goes to  Julia Roberts, whose nearly 4-minute acceptance speech started off  as selfless, and just snowballed itself into naive, self-righteousness. Julia, sweetie, if it feels like you don't even deserve to be up there, maybe you should be a bit more polite about it, to the other Oscar guests; thank mom, thank your boyfriend, thank your wonder bra, then get off the stage! Julia could learn something from Best Actor winner Russel Crowe, whose half-as-long speech seemed far more humble, as he said, ''When you grow up in the suburbs of anywhere, a dream like this seems unattainable," but "For anyone on the downside of advantage, and relying purely on courage, it's possible.'' That moment of Crowe's was far more moving than Julia's hackling "Woo-Ha! Ha! I love it up here!"

However, there isn't much more to say for an awards show where almost everyone was either dressed in all black or all white, with most of the biggest "risk-takers" wearing all-gray! This was a very no-nonsense year of the Oscars, and for that, it's hard to not give it a thumbs-up, if just marginally. There have been some more memorable Oscar telecasts, though last year wasn't one of them, and to say Steve Martin hosted on a year that was better than the most recent year hosted by Billy Crystal, is saying an awful lot. Either Martin or Crystal would make a wonderful host next year, though. The only thing now is to have some Best Picture nominees that evoke stronger emotions than the nominees did this year. If that happens, then the Oscar show will be exciting as well...as will the acceptance speeches...and the office pool!