Techtite's TV Reviews!

"This might sound like cool TV for the "shock value" fans, though it isn't. This is due in no small part to the chosen contestants; a rag tag bunch of men and women with no intrigue to them whatsoever."

---from the review

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Who's the more devious...? I know females who are regretfully "hooked" on this show, who hate Rebekah for her game tactics; a woman who doesn't really want to get married at all! Instead, she sees this as the perfect way to make some cash via the "dowry" she wins with each amorous advance from the males. However, what about Cecile; the woman who seems to have had sex with Tim #1 after just barely knowing the guy, yet constantly demeans Tim #2 for saying he'd drink wine from her own shoe? In truth, such a comment is an old fashioned concept; for a groom to drink wine from his bride's shoe. Yet Cecile wants us to believe this is idea is far more "sicko" than engaging in kinky sex with a nearly-TOTAL stranger. Yeah, Cecile; keep telling yourself that.

Looking for Love:

Bachelorettes in Alaska

A Review by Techtite

What is FOX's beef with the sanctity of marriage? Whatever the reason, they're at it again. Originally titled a far more desperate-sounding I want a Husband: Alaska, this latest reality TV FOX mini-series revolves around five women flown into Alaska, from all across the U.S. of A, to find Alaskan grooms looking for love. I often wonder if these women would've agreed to this, if shown previews of the opening credit crawl: "five women...desperate...last chance for marriage!" I can guaratee you one thing; they certainly wouldn't have agreed to it, if they saw the final product on national television!

Said bachelorettes include Karen (36, a business development manager), Cecile (26,  sales analyst), Andrea (34, adv. coordinator), Rebekah (27, real estate broker), and Sissie (31, interior designer). These women are offered a quintet of men each episode, to choose for a blind date. After a date with these men, the men must choose one of the five women to swoon, as a potential bride-to-be. This is most likely the woman they dated, though if the date was a complete and utter failure, the men can choose among the other four women as well. If chosen by the woman they swooned, these men will stay in the game as their personal "man on ice," while the women are introduced to five new men, for five new dates. The women then must choose between the new man, and the man-on-ice they met before. This leads to the finale, when hopefully, their final choice will propose!

Whether this makes any sense to you is immaterial; what is important, is how very, very brief time these women are given, to get to know any of the men, for more than idle dinner conversation (the dinners are with everyone together), idle breakfast conversation (ditto), and one or two dates! How are these potential brides--and grooms-- supposed to get better acquainted...? The answer to this question may surprise you; bedtime! This is the show's success as well as its failure; contestants with morals even looser than the temptresses of Temptation Island. This might sound like cool TV for the "shock value" fans, though it isn't. This is due in no small part to the chosen contestants; a rag tag bunch of men and women with little intrigue to them whatsoever.

Let's pursue this a little, by introducing you to some typical scenarios. Rebekah is the reigning only-in-it-for-the-money contestant (i.e., totally boring, since we know no man will propose to her).  Then there's Cecile, who seems to think that sleeping with a cute guy she just met makes her less of a "sicko" than some guy who suggested drinking wine from her shoe. I don't know what is more sad; how cliché the suggestion of using your bride's slipper as a drinking glass is, or using this cliché to shroud smutty behavior as excusable in comparison. Meanwhile, Karen is offered a disgusting "Alaskan delicacy" at dinner, only to whine that she "had to eat it" while the men tease her. What is this, the eighth grade? NO, Karen, THIS ISN'T SURVIVOR; you don't have to eat jack squat! Meanwhile, the clearly lovelorn Andrea uses the same dinner to act like she's gagging, leave the room for water, then huff that Kristian didn't look more concerned for her health. I'm left wondering if this IS junior high. 

The only redeeming value of the series is Sissie, a contestant who not only clearly entered the series for a groom; now that she's caught a good one, she's bound and determined to reel him in. This is a woman who, when her fellow bachelorettes give politically correct answers when asked about their choice of wedding ring, chirps out the answer, "Platinum, emerald cut!" with a smile, showing she is indeed a woman who's thought about her wedding day at least one day in her life. Sadly, Sissie is only offered, by logic, 20% of the screen time --about 12 minutes each 60 minute episode-- meaning the remaining time is devoted to total boresville, whining, and juvenile shenanigans.

It doesn't help matters when any feminist would claim that these women are treated like mail-order brides at best, and call girls at worst. That would be a correct assessment, sad as it is to say; for all of their sexual antics, they go home alone, with little more than a few bills to show for it all. Sure, by finale's end, Sissie indeed won her man...and yet, again, this was only 20% of the whole show. I'm not a critic who likes using natty final words, though it's hard to avoid here; any viewer after seeing these Bachelorettes in Alaska is left very, very cold.

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