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Techtite's TV Reviews! |
"Ah yes; then there was underdog Jesse, who arrived to greet DeAnna in blue jeans, pink shoelaces, and a suit coat that, to be perfectly candid, would've probably been rejected by Elton John even if he was about to sing a rendition of 'Crocodile Rock.'" ---from the review
------------------ Sidebar :: ------------- The Next Bachelor? That's a tough call. Graham is good looking, though one of the few times Deanna thought with her head and not her heart was when she saw the truth: Graham is not ready to commit. So that leaves Jeremy and Jason. Jason has a child, which would add a certain "zing" to a show that, after over a dozen seasons, is getting a little stale around the edges. Jeremy would seem like a good choice, though he was so into Deanna, who can say if he would agree to come back to this zany series? So When Did You Know, DeAnna? So many men ---Jeremy, Jason, Graham, et al.--- asked Deanna the same question, at varying points of the season; when did she know? She never could give a good answer aside from "I didn't choose until just before [moment of choice here]." While that may seem politically correct, it doesn't bode well for Jesse when the best she can keep offering the guy is "I didn't choose to keep you until the eleventh hour and even now I can't put into words why I chose you." Ouch, dude. |
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The Bachelorette: Deanna
Once upon a time, there was a show called The Bachelor which, quite frankly, I'd given up all hope on. After 13 seasons of "Bachelors" and "Bachelorettes," there has been one and only one actual marriage, between Trista and Ryan. That was over ten seasons ago. Since then, we've had bachelors who'd not only refuse to propose to the final lady on the series; one would actually offer the final girl an "engagement ring" on a necklace until he wanted her to wear it. Good...grief! The last time I tuned in to this series was actually season 11...and even then, I only watched the final minutes of the season finale, which promised a "shocking end to the season" unlike any other. Okay; I'll buy that. The end result: Bachelor "Brad" threw away the final girl, DeAnna, like she was a dirty shirt. DeAnna was allegedly heartbroken, in that way that can only be "solved" by another lackluster Bachelorette season. Now, jumping way ahead, it's fair enough to say that DeAnna's season of The Bachelorette did lead to a proposal, and she accepted. That's superior to earlier seasons of this series in every way. Yet there's no denying that her final choice was extremely...well, "off." While she insists she's in love, and it's not anyone else's place to insist otherwise: the series really didn't show any love connection here. This was a friendship and nothing more. While that's all well and good for most women, this was a season starring DeAnna: the lady who cried of heartache and true love and soulmates and needing the show to help her find "the perfect guy." Yet is her final choice really the "perfect guy?" Is this truly the guy who will be there for better or for worse, sickness and health, as long as they both shall live? Seriously? The season began promising enough, with DeAnna given 25 guys to interview, who'd immediately be reduced to 15 potential husbands. There was Jason, a lovable single father whose adorable son was the apple of his eye, making him an obvious choice for anyone looking for the perfect father figure. There was the good-looking yet not-ready-for-commitment Graham, who made DeAnna feel like a giddy schoolgirl...though was that enough? There was Jeremy, whose sad tale of losing his father and mother was not unlike DeAnna, who lost her own beloved mother when she was very young. This created a bond between DeAnna and Jeremy, that was seemingly unbreakable. Ah yes; then there was underdog Jesse, who arrived to greet DeAnna in blue jeans, pink shoelaces, and a suit coat that, to be perfectly candid, would've probably been rejected by Elton John even if he was about to sing a rendition of "Crocodile Rock." These four gentlemen were DeAnna's choices for the final four. If you hadn't seen the finale, could you guess which one "won" in the end...? Okay; enough gilding the lily. She chose Jesse. Yes; the dude with the pink shoelaces. He's also the dude with all his favorite snowboards stacked one by one on the wall of his home. DeAnna turned down the guy who was already a good father figure, the guy she had an emotional bond with, and even the guy who, to be frank, turned her on the most. She dumped them all, for Jesse. Don't ask me why; not even DeAnna could explain it with any emotional resonance. Yet choose Jesse she did...and clearly, weeks in advance! This goes double, if not triple, for the final dates between DeAnna's "final two": Jesse and Jason. Allow me to be frank: only a village idiot would not have realized DeAnna had already chosen to run off with the snowboarder dude, forcing ABC to try to make the final dates seem fair for both, and not "Jesse got the romantic date and Jason got the nightmare date so that makes Jesse the right choice!" Let's put it another way. Jesse and DeAnna share one last date on a secluded beach, with sand so clean and water so clear, you could see a starfish beneath the gentle waves. Jason, father of a young child, is forced to share a date with DeAnna among a school of sharks. That is not a metaphor. They actually threw Jason underwater with sharks, in one, last, desperate attempt to make the viewing audience feel Jason was less romantic than Jesse, based on these two inanely polarized dates. Yet DeAnna still was able to look Jason in the face, moments later, and insist her decision was made that very morning, not days earlier in the Bahamas. So it's just "coincidence" Jesse got the cool romantic date, and Jason "coincidentally" got the date seemingly written by Stephen King? Sure. Clearly. "Coincidence." Except...not. Jump ahead to the final two men proposing, when supposedly: neither of these guys knew the writing on the wall. Seriously? So Jason drove to DeAnna while already in tears because he was so emotional...about proposing? So Jesse, the guy who could've single-handedly invented the word "um..." ---and who looked ready to hurl on his way to simply buying the engagement ring--- was suddenly James freaking Bond when proposing to DeAnna?!? Look, guys; I don't know why DeAnna chose Jesse, though I'll say one thing good about him; he always had the humility to know he was among guys a dozen times better than him. That was part of his charm; his humility. Suddenly, for the first time this whole season, he's totally confident...and we're to believe this is coincidence? I'd almost have expected a conversation between Jesse and ABC prior to this supposed "unscripted" proposal, that went something like: "Oh, what's that, ABC? I'm the final guy? ...and you wrote me exactly what to say so it sounds slightly romantic that she chose the snowboarding dude? Thanks for that!" Yeah, right, ABC. Thanks for that. In the end, the joke would be on Jason and Jesse together. Didn't you hear? DeAnna loves Graham. Even Jason tried to tell DeAnna how obvious this was to anyone who watched the show, during the "After The Finale" interview show. DeAnna denied it to the fullest. Yet the video confessionals showed otherwise. No sooner did Graham act all cool and standoffish, then DeAnna gives him the heave-ho in haste...and regrets it immediately afterwards. A week later she's constantly saying how this show is the one after Graham, she doesn't know if she can feel for one of the remaining guys what she felt with Graham, she regrets her decision to not give a rose to Graham, though wait, she's about to go on a date...her first date, since losing Graham! College kids could make a very fun drinking game with the second-last episode of the season, taking a shot every time she mentions "Graham." You'll be drunk in 5 minutes...and passed out in 30. This matters little now; DeAnna is engaged. To Jesse. To hear DeAnna and Jesse tell the tale in the final interview: they're actually going through with it. They've even chosen a date: May 9th. Whoa: the first week of May sweeps. More "coincidences," no doubt. Maybe they'll get the same huge wedding that Trista and Ryan received, and maybe not. Yet you have to give DeAnna credit; she actually got a proposal. After over a dozen Bachelor seasons, that's extremely rare. The problem is: having the engagement lead to an actual wedding is even rarer. Good luck, DeAnna!
Opinions? Speak your mind in Techtite's Letters Page!
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