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The Lords of Tantrazz
(1997)
 Imagine if a Myst
clone looked at everything widely critiqued about Myst and decided to keep
it. Then they took everything
even vaguely tolerable about that game, and threw it all away! They then
decide that the best Myst clone should not have graphics in fluid CGI, but
instead use inanimate comic art that is barely underdog
comic strip quality. Imagine how horribly bad a game like that would be. Now imagine something far
worse, and you have a thumbnail-sized
concept of The Lords of Tantrazz . Much like Myst,
the action is in still pics, shown in mediocre slide-show
format. Unlike Myst, all graphics seem like
they've been scanned from a pre-pubescent amateur comic book.
The dialog is even worse; the heroine whispers during the game's
start, "A bottle of Jack's will do it to you every time,"
as if stumbling out of bed in a drunken stupor is soooooo cool.
Then you get to see this heroine's boresville of an "adventure"
life, with enough chauvinism to make even Hugh Hefner cringe.
For all the people who griped at the borderline "sexism"
of Tomb Raider; this
game makes Lara Croft look like Gloria Steinem. How arrogant
can this game get? The ending is a mere "to be continued"
message, asking you to wait for the sequel. Don't hold your breath
kids...
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